Bitter, because my aching arms should have been nursing a 5-month old boy in the middle of the morning worship service instead trying (and failing) to fight back tears the whole morning.
Bitter, because I know there are so many other women who are hurting on this day.
Bitter, because the effects of sin on this world that have caused what should be a joyful day to be filled with pain.
Bitter, because I know that all of these celebrations and holidays will be bittersweet for me this side of heaven.
Sweet, because of my little girl.
Sweet, because of the memories I have with my son and the impact of his life.
Sweet, because the life of a dying child gave us the gift of being better people as parents to our children.
Sweet, because today I think I started feeling little kicks of this new one I get to mother.
Sweet, because of a husband who knows my heartache and ministered to me today.
Sweet, because of all the messages I received today from people acknowledging how hard this day would be for someone like me.
Sweet, because the bitter points me to the sweetness that is to come, a sweet that will have no bitter whatsoever.
“Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, ‘Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.’ And he who was seated on the throne said, ‘Behold, I am making all things new.’ Also he said, ‘Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.'” (Revelation 21:1-5 ESV)
This was my Mother’s Day in all of it’s beauty and pain. Puffy eyes, a smile, and a kiss from my oldest.